the thing that sucks about writing this blog is that all of the really cool stuff that happens, like holidays, or local events, some good and others just democratically inspiring, i cant write about them for safety reasons. we had a festival that i know for a fact for some of the family here it was absolutely the most fun they had ever had in their lives. one of them came to me later saying, "i wasnt happy (in my home country). i wasnt happy in the home i tried to build later. today i am happy, first time". this in broken english was enough to get a hard heart like mine to melt just a little. the unique opportunities afforded to me in this life have allowed me the knowledge of the pain, suffering, and cruel things of which a person is capable. but it has allowed me to feel the depth of honesty, frailty, compassion, and love of which a person can be capable as well. i know i harp on it, but one of the hardest times in my life was the year in a japanese hospital. but my physical therapist saw my determination and was willing to push me even harder. we would actually both be crying during therapy session, me from the pain, and her from her willingness to push even harder when i begged her to. she is such an honestly empathetic person, someone so pure of heart i cant believe i will meet the likes of her again. but i know i will.